currently listening to: burns and stitches - fra lippo lippi
after a year of not blogging (not in this blog, at least), i start again with a rant.
i went to an exhibit and as soon as people saw me, people were asking me where is ___? and i was thinking, "and hello to you too!" my association with silverlens is both a curse and a blessing. problem is distinguishing which is which.
why can't they talk to me as toni? am i doomed to walk in the shadows of my ____ just because most of the artists i know met me at the gallery? until when will they think of me as that guy who works for ___?
hay...
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Monday, September 17, 2007
wake-up call?
from my friend jam: you're not keeping up with your blogspot lately
does this mean i will be posting stuff here again?
we'll see.
does this mean i will be posting stuff here again?
we'll see.
Monday, March 27, 2006
cotton candy dream
currently listening to: Sunshower - Chris Cornell
There are times when all you want is for everything to end, for everything to go. Just escape to a place no one knows – not even yourself. So you leave your bags behind, wishing to let go, only to realize that you’re still carrying everything with you: every smile, every touch, every kiss. And yes, every single tear. You wish it could be clearer, easier, simpler. But peace never reveals itself, especially to someone who doesn't want to forget. And you look at the road in front of you, not knowing where it goes, or how it ends. And you resign to the truth that nothing ever stops; that nothing ever really ends. And then you learn that moving on is nothing but a faithless leap. So you disappear, without a trace, without saying goodbye.
It’s early morning and we still can't see the sun. Maybe, it’s still on the other side of the horizon, where all lost lovers are.
There are times when all you want is for everything to end, for everything to go. Just escape to a place no one knows – not even yourself. So you leave your bags behind, wishing to let go, only to realize that you’re still carrying everything with you: every smile, every touch, every kiss. And yes, every single tear. You wish it could be clearer, easier, simpler. But peace never reveals itself, especially to someone who doesn't want to forget. And you look at the road in front of you, not knowing where it goes, or how it ends. And you resign to the truth that nothing ever stops; that nothing ever really ends. And then you learn that moving on is nothing but a faithless leap. So you disappear, without a trace, without saying goodbye.
It’s early morning and we still can't see the sun. Maybe, it’s still on the other side of the horizon, where all lost lovers are.
Saturday, February 18, 2006
mamang pulis
for 5 months now, my mom's been going to police school as required by her promotion. she's been going through training both in the classroom and on the field. and last monday, for their practical exam, they had an operation at some place in the province (the location i cannot divulge). if going to school everyday isn't hard enough for a person who's never been a fan of books and test papers, imagine doing a 60 kilometer trek, carrying a 60 pound pack, running and hiking on a pair of rheumatic legs, crawling and docking from bullets in ambush simulations, and having the sun blaze on top of you for 2 days! And she's 53!
anita daso reporting for duty, sir!
briefing at 4 am the following day.
goofing around with friends. (sir, not listening, o!)
10 kilometers down. 50 loooooong kilometers to go!
operation: pahinga muna. =)
one of the boys. macho mo ma! =)
moving along...
guess where this is. (hint: it's the mountain in the previous picture)
time space warp. after 2 days, 60++ kms. and 100,000 liters of gatorade. nice pj's by the way. =)
boodlefight! sort of...
happy happy! =)
But one thing about my mother, she's a strong woman. But it's not physical strength that makes her a cut above the rest (although i have to admit that for a woman she does have a strong pair of arms. and legs. and back. and everything.) what i really admire is her attitude and faith that keeps her going. she's been through a lot in her life, and to tell it would nothing be less than making a novel out of the cinderella story - minus the fairy god mother, of course.
My mother never gives up. And thank god she hasn't or else, i wouldn't be here writing this post. Again, the detail deserves a separate post in itself. But just to give you an idea, imagine having to put up with me for more than 22 years (and counting). Period. Wouldn't that be a nightmare! And to think I'm just half of the story.
A life of missed opportunities, broken dreams and bitter disappointments. But still she went on, thanked the Lord and smiled at the world. And because of that, she's my superwoman.
On monday (February 20), she's going on stage for her graduation. If only she knew how proud I am of her. Congratulations Mama. I love you po.
anita daso reporting for duty, sir!
briefing at 4 am the following day.
goofing around with friends. (sir, not listening, o!)
10 kilometers down. 50 loooooong kilometers to go!
operation: pahinga muna. =)
one of the boys. macho mo ma! =)
moving along...
guess where this is. (hint: it's the mountain in the previous picture)
time space warp. after 2 days, 60++ kms. and 100,000 liters of gatorade. nice pj's by the way. =)
boodlefight! sort of...
happy happy! =)
But one thing about my mother, she's a strong woman. But it's not physical strength that makes her a cut above the rest (although i have to admit that for a woman she does have a strong pair of arms. and legs. and back. and everything.) what i really admire is her attitude and faith that keeps her going. she's been through a lot in her life, and to tell it would nothing be less than making a novel out of the cinderella story - minus the fairy god mother, of course.
My mother never gives up. And thank god she hasn't or else, i wouldn't be here writing this post. Again, the detail deserves a separate post in itself. But just to give you an idea, imagine having to put up with me for more than 22 years (and counting). Period. Wouldn't that be a nightmare! And to think I'm just half of the story.
A life of missed opportunities, broken dreams and bitter disappointments. But still she went on, thanked the Lord and smiled at the world. And because of that, she's my superwoman.
On monday (February 20), she's going on stage for her graduation. If only she knew how proud I am of her. Congratulations Mama. I love you po.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
by the way...
currently listening to: brighter than sunshine - aqualung
...did i mention, graduate na ako? yipee!!! =)
...did i mention, graduate na ako? yipee!!! =)
awww... (ma, di ako makahinga...)
sa wakas, natapos din! =)
(mama: nakakangawit ngumiti...) (toni: ano kaya handa?)
commdept pips! (oo na, ako na ang pinakamatanda! hmph!) =)
meet my cat rover! (meow!) =)
mama and my pamangkin lila. =)
more of mama and my pamangkins =)
the daso family! =)
not part of the graduation pics. hahaha! =)
Sunday, January 29, 2006
come around
currently listening to: Rhett Miller - Come Around
The door opens in front of her. And there he stands outside, waiting.
WOMAN: You’re here.
MAN: Yes, I am.
WOMAN: Why?
MAN: Because you called.
WOMAN: You’re mistaken.
MAN: Maybe I am.
WOMAN: Then you should go.
MAN: I will. After I know the reason why you called.
WOMAN: How do you know it was me?
MAN: Because you’ve done this before.
WOMAN: Done what?
MAN: Call without saying a word.
WOMAN: Would you have listened?
MAN: I don’t know.
WOMAN: So you come here.
MAN: To listen.
WOMAN: And yet, you still do not understand.
MAN: I understand that you called for a reason.
WOMAN: Did you answer when it rang?
MAN: I should’ve.
WOMAN: Why didn’t you?
MAN: Because I knew it was you.
WOMAN: It wasn’t me.
MAN: Who was it then?
WOMAN: You would have known if you only picked up the phone.
MAN: I'd pick it up. But you'd always keep silent.
WOMAN: She didn’t want to talk to you?
MAN: You'd only listen to my voice. And then hang up.
WOMAN: She wanted for you to be the one to call.
MAN: And you wanted me to come.
WOMAN: To go to her.
MAN: To wait outside your door.
WOMAN: She called to see if you cared.
Silence only between them.
Footsteps nearby break the stillness.
Someone emerges from the room.
She was not alone.
MAN: I understand.
WOMAN: Don’t pretend that you do.
MAN: I understand that many things were left unsaid.
WOMAN: And you wait for the things I will never say.
MAN: And I leave now without hearing you say it.
But it is she who turns to leave.
MAN: Why did you call?
WOMAN: Because I was waiting.
MAN: For me to call.
WOMAN: And I waited.
MAN: For me to come.
WOMAN: But you never came.
MAN: Not until now.
WOMAN: I called to say goodbye.
The door closes behind her. And he stands outside, waiting.
The door opens in front of her. And there he stands outside, waiting.
WOMAN: You’re here.
MAN: Yes, I am.
WOMAN: Why?
MAN: Because you called.
WOMAN: You’re mistaken.
MAN: Maybe I am.
WOMAN: Then you should go.
MAN: I will. After I know the reason why you called.
WOMAN: How do you know it was me?
MAN: Because you’ve done this before.
WOMAN: Done what?
MAN: Call without saying a word.
WOMAN: Would you have listened?
MAN: I don’t know.
WOMAN: So you come here.
MAN: To listen.
WOMAN: And yet, you still do not understand.
MAN: I understand that you called for a reason.
WOMAN: Did you answer when it rang?
MAN: I should’ve.
WOMAN: Why didn’t you?
MAN: Because I knew it was you.
WOMAN: It wasn’t me.
MAN: Who was it then?
WOMAN: You would have known if you only picked up the phone.
MAN: I'd pick it up. But you'd always keep silent.
WOMAN: She didn’t want to talk to you?
MAN: You'd only listen to my voice. And then hang up.
WOMAN: She wanted for you to be the one to call.
MAN: And you wanted me to come.
WOMAN: To go to her.
MAN: To wait outside your door.
WOMAN: She called to see if you cared.
Silence only between them.
Footsteps nearby break the stillness.
Someone emerges from the room.
She was not alone.
MAN: I understand.
WOMAN: Don’t pretend that you do.
MAN: I understand that many things were left unsaid.
WOMAN: And you wait for the things I will never say.
MAN: And I leave now without hearing you say it.
But it is she who turns to leave.
MAN: Why did you call?
WOMAN: Because I was waiting.
MAN: For me to call.
WOMAN: And I waited.
MAN: For me to come.
WOMAN: But you never came.
MAN: Not until now.
WOMAN: I called to say goodbye.
The door closes behind her. And he stands outside, waiting.
Friday, December 23, 2005
steady lang
currently listening to: Reaching Out – Lea Salonga
Steady-lang is for the weak.
I didn’t know what this idea meant until last night. Salamat jackiepot for explaining this philosophy to me. :)
Steady lang means no expectations, go with the flow, live with what you have. Steady lang means you should enjoy the rollercoaster ride. Horace said it best with his Carpe Diem, although I doubt it if the Greek guy would ever really go to a theme park, with all the sweet candies, bright balloons and happy people.
Steady lang means you should live in the moment. You live, you learn. You cry, you learn. You die, you learn. The song is old. But then again, I am old. And the only thing I learned is that you never really learn. The truth is, you learn nothing.
Steady lang means you can ask so much, when you only need to do is give so little. If life gives you what you ask for, then be thankful. If it doesn’t, you shouldn’t be surprised; you didn’t deserve anything in the first place.
Steady lang means you can always push your luck. And at the end, all you need to say is sorry. Sorry for everything, thanks for everything. It’s that simple. It’s not fair, I know. But life never is.
Steady lang means you need not think about life. The world is too complicated to be taken seriously. Answers to questions only lead to either confusion or bitterness. A yes is never a yes. And a no is always a no.
Steady lang never looks forward, since the future hasn’t happened yet. And besides, it never really goes the way you want it, so why bother? Steady lang never looks back either. The past is gone. Deal with it. Get over it. Forget it.
Steady lang means you should never care. Because caring necessitates a surrender. And fortune always makes a clown of the loser.
Steady lang teaches us that attachment is not love, silence is not peace and a smile never means happiness.
Steady lang works for a lot of people. I hated them then. I understand them now. But I should make it clear that I do not suggest Steady lang for everyone. Steady lang is only for the coward, the irresponsible, the selfish. Steady lang is for the libertine.
I am a coward. I am irresponsible. I am selfish. I’ve been hurt so many times, in so many ways. Now that I know what Steady lang means, I will never be hurt again.
Steady lang is for the weak. Because we never pretend that we are strong. We are honest of our frailties and we accept how dreadful the world really is. Because of that, we are free.
Steady-lang is for the weak.
I didn’t know what this idea meant until last night. Salamat jackiepot for explaining this philosophy to me. :)
Steady lang means no expectations, go with the flow, live with what you have. Steady lang means you should enjoy the rollercoaster ride. Horace said it best with his Carpe Diem, although I doubt it if the Greek guy would ever really go to a theme park, with all the sweet candies, bright balloons and happy people.
Steady lang means you should live in the moment. You live, you learn. You cry, you learn. You die, you learn. The song is old. But then again, I am old. And the only thing I learned is that you never really learn. The truth is, you learn nothing.
Steady lang means you can ask so much, when you only need to do is give so little. If life gives you what you ask for, then be thankful. If it doesn’t, you shouldn’t be surprised; you didn’t deserve anything in the first place.
Steady lang means you can always push your luck. And at the end, all you need to say is sorry. Sorry for everything, thanks for everything. It’s that simple. It’s not fair, I know. But life never is.
Steady lang means you need not think about life. The world is too complicated to be taken seriously. Answers to questions only lead to either confusion or bitterness. A yes is never a yes. And a no is always a no.
Steady lang never looks forward, since the future hasn’t happened yet. And besides, it never really goes the way you want it, so why bother? Steady lang never looks back either. The past is gone. Deal with it. Get over it. Forget it.
Steady lang means you should never care. Because caring necessitates a surrender. And fortune always makes a clown of the loser.
Steady lang teaches us that attachment is not love, silence is not peace and a smile never means happiness.
Steady lang works for a lot of people. I hated them then. I understand them now. But I should make it clear that I do not suggest Steady lang for everyone. Steady lang is only for the coward, the irresponsible, the selfish. Steady lang is for the libertine.
I am a coward. I am irresponsible. I am selfish. I’ve been hurt so many times, in so many ways. Now that I know what Steady lang means, I will never be hurt again.
Steady lang is for the weak. Because we never pretend that we are strong. We are honest of our frailties and we accept how dreadful the world really is. Because of that, we are free.
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